Apples- Guys and Girls (for Batchelors)

Boys are like apples on trees.
The best ones are at the top of the tree.
The girls don't want to reach for the good ones because they're afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead they just get the rotten apples that are on the ground, that aren't as good, but easy.
So the apples at the top think that there is something wrong with them, when in reality, they are amazing.
That is why we just have to be a little patient and wait for the right girl who will come someday.......
, the one who has the courage to reach the top
So Guys if you are alone...this means that u r on top..........!!!!

Girls should take a chance to find the good, right apple,

Proud to be bachelor :-)

Why Indian Dad's r simply da best?

A young Indian man excitedly tells his Dad he's fallen in love and that he is going to get married.

He says, "Dad, I'm going to bring over 3 women and you try and guess which one I'm going to marry." The Dad agrees.

The next day, he brings three beautiful women into the house and sits them down on the couch and they chat for a while.

Later, he says, "Okay Dad, guess which one I'm going to marry."
Dad immediately replies, "The one on the right."

" That's amazing, Dad. You're right. How did you know?"

The Indian Dad replies,

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" I DON'T LIKE HER !!"
:-)

doubt in mahabaratha

In some remote village of India, one masterji is teaching the Mahabharat Katha to class 6 students.
He is at the 'krishnajanma' part of it.

Masterji: "Kansa heard the akashwani that his sister's 8th child is going to kill him. He was furious. He ordered to put vasudev n devki behind the bars.

First son is born, and kansa kills him by poisoning...

Second one is born n kansa throws him off the mountain peak

Third one is born..."

Now Ramu, who is smartest of the lot, puts up his hand. Masterji, I have a doubt (sounding nervous n confused)

"Ramu bete, whole india does not have doubt in mahabharata then how come u have one?"

Ramu : Masterji, if Kansa knew that Devaki's 8th child was going to Kill him,

WHY THE HELL DID HE PUT VASUDEV AND DEVAKI IN THE SAME CELL ?

Masterji fainted.........................no answer.....

Ultimate Manager..

Criminal Brain

It's revealed from inside sources. Criminal Lawyer Venkata Ramana Murthy, the father of Sirish Bharadwaj is the man behind this Arya Samaj marriage. It is said that Criminal Lawyer said to his son, "See! Let us be practical. Both of you are in love. If we go to Chiranjeevi and ask for her daughter, you can imagine what happens. Things will not be right there. Although Chiranjeevi may agree with kind heartedness, there are people behind to stop this. Same thing happened in Uday Kiran's case. And if we make you get married silently then we will be troubled by Chiranjeevi's family. So there is only one way. Both of you marry in Arya Samaj. We say that we don't know about this marriage. You too don't raveal that this is my sketch. We will lock the doors on that day and say we are out of station. If we get threat from Chiranjeevi's family, we say that even we too are worried for this as our son betrayed us and married without telling us. You tell that we wouldn't agree to this marriage even though informed. That way we will be saved. But what you have to do is call media during your marriage. Let Chiranjeevi's family know about this only through media. Don't call media and say that Chiranjeevi's daughter is getting married in Arya Samaj and so come there. Before media comes, Chiranjeevi's family may come there. That is the network they have. So what you have to do is call them saying that there is one important issue going on in Arya Samaj. Media would certainly come for coverage for getting some news item. So let media people also know that they are shooting Chiranjeevi's daughter only when they come there". Bharadwaj listened to all this carefully and said the same to Srija. Srija too liked it and with the help of friends Bharadwaj made it possible. Bharadwaj is a badminton player. That's how Srija made friendship with him. Even she was into badminton.

Intel joke ...nice isn't it?

There was a gentleman walking with two heavy suitcases in an airport
terminal. Someone approached and asked him what time it was. The
gentleman bends down to park the two heavy suitcases and stare at his
watch. But this was no ordinary watch! He touches a tiny button and his
administrative assistant's face appears.

He asks her, "Mary, what time is it?" Mary answers instantly and with a
smile!


The questioner is thoroughly impressed!!!


He asks, "What kind of a watch is that?"


"It's like a TV with two-way real-time communication," the gentleman
explains. He adds that the watch is the latest technology with Intel's
brand new 128-bit chip with processor speed of 10 Gigahertz.


The onlooker is now quite impressed and wanted to know if he could buy
this watch from the gentleman. They agree on a heavy price and the cash
was handed immediately. The gentleman takes his watch out and hands it
over and then walks away.


The new owner stares at the two heavy suitcases and shouts, "Sir, you
forgot your suitcases."


The gentleman stops, smiles, and replies, "No, they are yours now. They
are the modems you always need to carry for your new watch.